I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
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