...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Randomize