I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
Can I color on your dick again?
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
