My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Randomize