i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
