susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize
