hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Randomize
