I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
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