is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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