Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
I need a hoe opinion
go on
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize
