Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
I'm gonna write a song for the kids called "you're systematically killing your mother". In it I will explain that my recent hypertension and increase in smoking is due to them being dicks
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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