I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
