Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
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