either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
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