I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
I just found puke in my bra..
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Randomize
