Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
Randomize
