I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Randomize