You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
This is the high leading the old right now
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize
