dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
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