you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
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