I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Randomize
