hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
Randomize
