I don't think brook has ever known best
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
