She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize