I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
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