is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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