I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
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