Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
Randomize
