when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
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