if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Randomize
