just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
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