We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Randomize
