Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
