So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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