I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize
