I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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