Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize