have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Dear sober self: your car keys are in the glove compartment, your car is outside the church. I hope you're reading this from your own bed instead of someone else's.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize
