My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Randomize
