i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Randomize
