i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
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