I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize