Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
