the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
I love how my cats smell like pot.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
NoShamevember. You game?
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
Randomize
