I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
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