It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Randomize
