Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
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