Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
Randomize
