Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
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