If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
