I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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